About Me - Calling All Caregivers

Hi, my name is Melodi Hall and I live in Southwest Virginia. I was born and raised in Aurora, Illinois. I married my first husband in 1989, had 3 boys and lived in the surrounding area of my childhood until 1998 when we moved to Virginia to start a new chapter of our lives.

In 2006, we separated but the divorce was not final until 2008. It was a long 20 years for both of us but we had finally made it to the point where we could move on with our lives. We had a very toxic relationship between us and should have known in the beginning it would never work but we were young and foolish. So 3 kids. 700 miles away and 20 years later we finally figured it out.

I had began back to school in 2004 at our local community college and graduated in 2007 with 2 Associates Degrees. I worked an array of jobs such as cleaning new construction homes, student jobs at the college, tutoring, etc. as much as I could to pay the bills. In 2009, I landed a steady part time position at the community college. It was at this time that I met the love of my life!

In late 2009, we began dating and life was amazing. The next 7 years were just a whirlwind of the happiest days of my life. We did everything together, if you say him, you saw me. We went back to Illinois to visit, my family adored him, my kids adored him, life was perfect.

I went back to school 2 more times to receive my Bachelors and Masters degrees, we created a strong family bond with all of our children and grandchildren. We have 7 kids and 9 grandchildren! We moved into house that was ours, not mine. Finally on June 26th, 2016 he asked me to marry him! We were married 2 weeks later on July 9, 2016 at the cutest little chapel in Gatlinburg, TN!

In the next 9 months, our lives would begin to be turned upside down.

July 2016 – Father in law falls and breaks hip
August 2016 – Father in law passes away
October 2016 – I lose job after 4 years
November 2016 – I start new job
February – Husband starts feeling “strange”
March 2017 – I plan sinuplasty/deviated septum surgery
April 2017 – I have surgery
April 2017 – Husband diagnosed with metastatic prostate cancer

This is only the beginning. April 2017 was the beginning of our medical nightmare. Since that time we have been through open heart surgery, valve replacement, a stroke, COPD, cirrhosis, dozens of hospital stays including ICU stays, life support, paracentesis, hernia repair, pacemaker, etc. I could go on and on but I would have to pull out notes and books on everything to remember it.

I remember sitting in the hospital one day and someone asked if I was his caretaker and I said “No, I am his wife”. And they said “Yes, then you are his caretaker.” I will never forget that moment. It was earth shattering for me.

That moment is what brings me to writing this. To help others who feel lost and scared. Who don’t know they are caretakers or that they don’t know how to be a caretaker. They have questions, need support, need resources or feel like they just can’t do it.

I will be the first to admit it is a scary thing to say that word out loud. To connect that adjective with yourself is admitting that you are responsible for the care of another person and all of the medical jargon, issues, problems, explanations, heartbreaks, wins, losses, and so much more that go along with it. But just think, if its not you, then who?

As of April 2022, I was diagnosed with Rheumatoid Arthritis. Who has time for that?

I am calling all caregivers, young and old, big and small, new or experienced. Let’s unite and help eachother not feel so alone!

Have Hope, Have Faith and Stay Strong!

Melodi